it’s a matter of fact

 

this is inspired by Black Dada

 

thanks for being inspired Adam P

 

let it be known this shall never be finished

 

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take this leave that

 

did you touch me now you read this grinning thinking you knew me

 

fuck you you're the voyeur

 

don’t ask me about my bank balance

 

my business isn’t yours

 

get verified blue tick next to the name means i mean something

 

twitter facebook instagram what a fucking usless scam

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usless isn't a typo there's no us or we nor you and me when we only say i and i am guilty
 

the we stopped meaning something to me

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useless

 

words stop meaning anything but i’m told it’s how you get paid

 

to promote what a thousand images here and there

 

caption this like that follow this follow me follow who

 

make a story for the bots

 

some cute boy with pretty eyes telling you what’s what

 

he hearted my filtered videos so now i exist

 

i’m wired in and looking for something organic

 

there’s no escape

 

escaping within escapism

 

do you find this pretentious?

 

well you asked me to listen to your song with fours words

 

that you repeat in any sequence to create meaning

 

for some people who will pay to buy merch

 

that makes them feel like they're a part of something

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the drug that is belonging

 

not everything is bad

 

not everything is good

 

i am using this as a defence having spent days

 

checking who liked what and why they did and then

 

being slammed back to a self who never cared about any of that

 

wondering who i am now

 

Miss Now

 

some artificial existence that reaches something

 

anything could mean everything

 

and everything could mean nothing

 

i have thousands of unopened emails waiting for me 

 

when i stop looking will it all stop existing

 

no they say we’re in the Metaverse

 

whatever that means i just want soft real grass

 

pen and paper

 

book between my hands where i can feel pages

 

but then i’m ancient or a romantic

 

and i’m back to the bittersweet reality that

 

what we have online has to mean something now

 

Miss No! make it mean something to someone

 

more than a character in a play, tv show, feature film

 

see me petrified by the medicine i take

 

because the world is a lonely place
 

lonelier because now i’m looking for meaning 

 

through an app on a phone

 

clinging to a tweet or a hashtag

 

numbers and pictures that are meant to be supportive

 

meant to be negative

 

meant to mean something 

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something something something

 

when it all just feels like a void

 

pessimist? no

 

i’m tea and the cigarettes i claim i don’t smoke

 

i’m English rain and Arabian sea and sun

 

i’m petrol, gasoline, energy, a target

 

so desirable

 

i’m defined by my degrees

 

i’m defined by my passport and residence permits

 

i’m defined by my roots – are they there?

 

i’m defined by my love – are you there?

 

i probably look like someone you wish you knew

 

as you scroll through your phone, browse through your laptop

 

and stumble across another name with an image

 

of someone who could be

 

real, breathing, living, alive

 

human

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not just another domain

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or instagram grid where we add archive caption delete

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my life in images and codes and algorithms

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not a single face in front of me

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no how are you?

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let me help you

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just screens made of cellophane

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unbreakable plexiglass that shatters my brain

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and i thank the rainbow coloured glowing neon gods for the music

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thank you for the music